Ramblings

One of the guys on my team at work just received the best email ever received from any customer ever.

Ever.

"As well as this quite randomly last night I went in my front room to find that my interwebs had fallen out of the computermebob and I can't find them anywhere, and the picture box isn't showing any flicker shows either, so i've lost both of these as well as the ring-dinger not ring-dinging.

The modem has all of it's lights flashing quite quickly and randomly that led me to suspect it was taking some time out to enjoy a little rave so I sat in front of it with a whistle and some glosticks waiting for the laser show and generic Scooter tune but neither appeared, so i'm now unsure if these lights mean it's having a silent disco or just waving to get my attention.

The picture making box attached to the tele shows a pretty Virgin media logo when it's not flicking between black and slightly less black screens, and the front bit keeps saying AP- *random number*. At first I thouhgt this may be a countdown to something spectacular, then I realised the numbers are not in sequence, jumping from 35 to 52 like some vaudeville numerical rebellion.

I have tried a few little tricks I use when my pet rats aren't doing what I want them to and sat in front of the box with a piece of cucumber held out in front of it and gently cooing "it's ok darlin....come one". Needless to say this has proven a fruitless endeavor.

Could you please advise the best course of action as I fear if this situation is the same when I get home, with no interwebs and no flickershows, I might be forced into a conversation with my flatmate, and neither of us want that to happen

Thanks in advance"

The journey home made today worthwhile with swans and courtesans.

The courtesans were a Moulin Rouge themed Lush pamper night, although I could only drop in for a fly-by visit, but that didn't matter because woohoo, face full of cleavage everywhere; and the swan was... rather surreally beautiful, marvellous, and outright weird.

On one of the busiest streets in Liverpool city centre, a swan had just wandered out onto the road, minding its own business and ignoring everyone else's, stopped in the middle of the road, and started grooming itself. And didn't stop. Completely unruffled by the cars having to inch around it; completely ignoring the car beebs, or people getting out to try and shoo it; it just wasn't having any of it. And when it was done having a mid-road groom, it waddled very, very slowly across the remainder of the road, hopped up onto the pavement, and continued to groom itself.

It was gorgeous, and completely nuts.